Mama's Day off.

Hello world!

I feel like 20 years has passed but in reality, it’s been just a couple of years, months maybe that I have this time for myself. 

Just one complete day of absolutely doing nothing other than staring at the sea holding a paper cup that holds my all-time favorite drink-Jack and Coke. 

The last time I ever did this was many years ago. To be exact, it was 2009 in the lovely island of Guam where I mostly enjoyed moments like this. Just me, the ocean and Jack. 

Fast forward to 2018, 9 years after, 3 daughters and many pounds heavier, I heartily come back to where my soul finds solace. And damn, pardon my language, but it feels surreal and dreamy to be in this side of the world.

A 6-hour drive from my hometown is a hidden paradise called home to most surfing enthusiast. It’s probably a half mile road that collect memories from hundreds of happy feet that comes and goes. 

Cali-coan Island in Samar was our destination. 

With me were cousins and very close friends who were up for an adventure. But for Mama’s like me, it was my day off. 

The cure for anything they say is salt water - sweat, tears or the sea.

At times, when the world seems to feel so small because, well, life happened, I find myself wanting to break free. I know that some Mamas out there will understand my thoughts and what my heart is pouring out at the moment. We just need a day or two or three to refresh and get the groove going. We are not just housewives who tidy up things and take care of our children. We are the one that makes the house full of life as we carry the heart of the home. Never think that just because you are a stay at home Mom, you are too small because as a matter of fact, we rule the world, we rule our children’s little world of make believe and magic.

So, do not think less of yourselves any longer. Take a break from whatever beautiful chaos you are in just because you deserve it, once in a while. Take time to read a nice book, get some tan, have a little Jack and Coke and wear those swimsuit that used to make you feel sexy. Let’s embrace our curves and imperfections and have a great time, since time is fleeting so let us not waste it.

Thank you Dear God for your beautiful creation and all the wonders it has done for us!

xoxo

Better days to come.

It just turned 5:19 in the earliest of mornings (my mornings) one Saturday when I held my 3 precious angels beside me as we scout outside our room to give them another scenery, one that allows them to smell the grass (early morning dew smell warms my heart always) and give them more space to hurdle. Sabel and Clara had their fair share of cry outbursts simultaneously around 330 in the morning and I just couldn't put them back to sleep anymore. They both want to be cuddled and carried at some point and sadly, I only have my own pair of hands. I had to wake up my eldest Julia so she can help me and cheer up Clara who has been crying non-stop as I try to sway Sabel back to sleep. It worked for just a few minutes up until I had no more energy to sway, hum a lullaby and create a soothing face. And so I took them out. 

I waited for the sunrise to come up until I can call for help. My eyes were shutting down and watching them all three together who's sleepy, hungry and bored alone isn't really a wonderful thing anymore.

Oh how hard adulting is!

More so parenting in this conventional world I'm living in. 

I wish there was a pause button to breathe and rest. 

I wish I had a charger to plug myself into just to recharge my almost-empty battery life. 

So, yes, it's a little past five in the morning and I'm carrying my fidgety 6 month old baby, holding Sabel's shirt as she is fond of running around me and thanking Julia for a job well done for helping Mama. I look at the sunrise and quickly snap a photo to remind me of this day. 

I shall not forget that today, I held them all alone, my girls, my light and my hope for better days to come.