On your 7th month...

My dearest sweetie pie, 

Let me begin by saying how Mama loves unwrapping everything about you. From day to day, I feel like we've become best of friends already. Now, that you are seven months old, you've mastered the art of eating. Oh how I love to see you eat as your face lightens up when you're full and contented. 

They say, a baby changes his or her patterns and habits from time to time. But all in seven months you haven't changed your sleeping routine. You constantly wake up very early in the morning when the world is dark and still. Sometimes, I trick you to falling asleep again but you won't oblige as you want to be brought outside. 

As I write this, you're on my chest sleeping like an angel. Speaking of angels, I, without doubt think that your guardian angel must be full of humor and happiness, as you, even in your sleep would smile from ear to ear. Asleep or awake your smile melts my heart. Always.

You love to walk around your crib and even holding on to one hand style. You're such a strong baby and I am mighty proud of you. Your crawling skills are like those of commandos. 

I can't wait to know you more, to see you grow and to see you live life to its fullest just like your big sister Julia.

I love you, Sabel!

Love,

Mama

To the sweetest baby on your 6th month.

My dearest Sabel, as I scribble on this note, you are lying comfortably on my chest. And believe me, we can go as much time as you need to my little girl. With a loud burp that you just let out, I know a few minutes is on till I put you down beside me to sleep. But right now, let me hold you a little bit longer. Let me surrender to your sweet smell of a baby. Let me sink in to your breath that smells like milk. Let me surround you with my warmth as I embrace you closer. I know time will go by very fast and before long, you'll be so big, you might not want me holding you like this. 

All I need is this very moment to feel you. You are such a good baby Sabel. You've are the most patient human  I've ever met. I hope you will remain to have that virtue with you as you journey through life. You will need it always.

Sabel, Mama is so proud of you, as you turn 6 months old you've done so many wonderful things already. 

You are such a big eater and I giggle every time you crave for more. 

You've tried quite a handful of veggies and fruits already. Let me tell you what your happy tummy has been grinding this past few weeks; squash, carrots, potatoes, malunggay leaves, sayote, green peas, avocado, banana, Apple, pear, papaya, white rice, chicken liver and oatmeal. I know in time we can have more and I'm so happy you love what you eat. 

I simply cannot wait for you to walk and run so you can play in the garden with your sister. It would be nice to hold you and your sister hand in hand as we go for our daily paseo. The many places we can go and the many things we shall do together excites me so much. 

And as I end this note, I caught you smiling in your sleep, a lot of times successively. They say, when babies smile in their sleep it is because their angel is playing with them. Yet, you who's awake or asleep smile almost every second and that's the most wonderful thing about you. Maybe God has sent me one of His angels to remind me the goodness of this world. To inspire me to become a good mother and a better person.

Thank you Sabel for being the sweetest baby in the world! Your Daddy, Julia and I are so lucky to have you. 

To my sweet Sabel on your 5th month.

Dearest Sabel 

It's been 5 months since you gave us joy in this world. 

You have grown so fast my little chum chum. You are going to be a big girl like Mama. Your strong arms and legs are like those of true-born athletes. You have what it takes to become one, someday, Daddy, Mama and Julia will support you all the way.

You've been nothing but joy to us. You seem to lift my spirits up every time I am weary. You somehow know how Mama feels given that you always see me in my different moods. Thank you Dear Sabel for understanding me! For understanding how it is that at times I must really have to put your sister first than you. Someday, Mama will tell you why, it's not time now, you're too young to comprehend. But for now, I just wanna thank you for understanding her as well. I can see already that you look up to her. Each morning, she's the first one you look for besides myself. Just simply the tone of her voice would make you squeal with delight. Your smile looks so beautiful every time you see her coming at you. You adore her the most and for that I'm thankful. 

Every morning Julia looks forward for your playtime where Mama places you on the bed with her by your side. She cuddles you with so much love and sincerity it makes my heart melt. 

You have been enjoying play time because now you can finally pick up toys by yourself holding it close and shifting it here and there. Your strong grip is something. People have been amazed on how strong you really are.

You are starting to eat your vegetables and Mama is so happy. I pray you will love your vegetables. I pray you'll grown healthy and smart.

You are a happy child, Sabel. 

You're always beaming with love. Your sweet smile has caught the hearts of many. 

Just like your sister Julia, your eyes twinkle every time you smile. You make Mama's blues go away. You make heavy days seem lighter. I thank you for that.

Thank you for giving Mama your purest smile always. 

I love you to the moon and back my sweet baby.

Love,

Mama

Dearest Sabel on your 4th month.

Four months with you has been so beautiful. I cannot believe how big you've grown up to be. I can still remember how fragile you were the first time I laid my eyes on you. How delicate your fingers and your toes were. You were such a gentle and sweet newborn. 

Now, you've become this adorable chunky goodness of a baby if I can just put it in words. You're so full and big all over. You've become so strong and lean makes me want to think you're a giant. With all your growth and beauty still you've remained to be calm, loving and sweet. 

Can I just say that I am so in love with your eyes that twinkles every time you smile? They're like diamonds, Sabel. Your eyes are so captivating! 

Your smile has become everyone's main attraction as you flash it almost every minute. You're the happiest baby I've ever seen. Sometimes a day goes by that I never hear you cry, you are always happy that way. And for that I am so thankful. 

May you remain to be sweet and gentle as you grow up. May you constantly be our new ray of sunshine. May you always cheer up your big sister when she's not having a good hair day. May you always be attentive to everyone not letting your eyes pass most especially when food is present. May you continue to blossom like a lovely flower. May your days be kind and soothing. May you always be filled with grace as you radiate it towards me. May you be your sister's friend and protector. 

And may you always be Mama's little chunky baby. I will forever and always love you and your sister.

Love,

Mama

They're so big, I'm small.

Coming home from school, my daughter tells me, "mama, I didn't get so much stars," showing me her hands. I curiously asked, but why darling? 

My heart was broken when I heard her answer. 

"Because Mama, my classmates are so big and I'm small and I couldn't reach it."

But then I am reminded that she is now three years old and will get lots of moments like this. 

I went about my afternoon, going thru the hustle bustle of a Wednesday and  completely imagining what could I possibly tell Julia that she will understand. 

So tonight, I played with her. Bathe her and had a good time like we always do. When she was all clean and fresh, I prompted her in front of me and told her I needed to talk to her. She looks into my eye waiting for me to talk. 

Deep breath.

Julia, when you were born, God made you so special. 

Remember the time when you were a baby and the doctors had to fix your hip? 

She nods herself. She remembers everything by the way.

And I knew she's a big girl and can handle what I was going to say next.

Darling, they had to fix your bones because you have Dysplasia. 

Can you say Dysplasia?

"Deespleeeesia she tells me."

So when there are times that you

can't reach and can't simply get more stars, always remember how God made you. 

I tell her with ease. 

And love, it's okay if you don't get so much stars, at least you've got some already.

So I flash a question to check if she got me.

Julia, why didn't you get so much stars?

"because Mama, my classmates are so big and I can't reach it"

But why I ask even more?

"I'm small." She adorably tells me so.

Why are you small? I ask some more.

"because Jesus made me special."

That'll do for now. 

My sweet little Julia.

Here she is before going to a party. 

To Sabel on your 3rd month.

I find myself candidly staring at you at 3 in the morning on a cold Saturday. I just finished feeding you and you're now doing your hourly stretch. 

Here I am admiring every second of what seems to be such a graceful act of yours. Beaming with pride on how lovely you've become all in 3 months time. 

I examine every single detail of your face and body and again, again and again. Just like that, I can't help but giggle every time I come across the jiggly parts of your body. You're such a chunky little darling! 

You've managed to carry yourself, proudly carrying your weight as you bring your head to center, balancing here and there, you've manage to stand tall with ease and pride. As we carry you, you position your legs and make it dangle here and there, so strong and so lean. You've mastered the art of putting your hands close to your mouth imagining the simple pleasures of having icecream perhaps? And how amazing it is to see you make that move when you kick and lift your tummy up, you look so strong and mighty sometimes people would mistakingly think that you are a boy. 

Oh sweet Sabel! You're a dream baby! I've never had so much smiles coming back at me in a day. You are my sweetest sunshine. 

I can't seem to put into words how you've brought that light to us. Even your sister Julia has grown fond of you, always demanding of you and always wanting.

I've always admired how you without a doubt smile back at me when Julia is having a bad-hair day. Sometimes I feel that you get me, where I am at and whatever I am feeling. Your comforting smile does the trick and one has got to see it when the magic happens for them to understand what I'm saying. 

I can't wait for us three to lay on a blanket and have our tea parties one after the other, simply enjoying and overly excited all the time. 

You and your sister are my precious gems and I am beaming with pride to be your mother.

Time does fly. You're three months old already and you've given so much joy to us. 

I find myself wanting for the sun to shine now, for you to wake up in a glorious morning as I joyfully sing to you my song, "you are my sunshine, my only sunshine..." To which you fully acknowledge my presence as you flash the sweetest and purest smile there is. 

I love you so much, Sabel!

Always,

Mama

Goodbye Chesi!

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, For the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Matthew 9:14

Julia has lost a cousin and a playmate but then heaven has gained a beautiful angel to watch over us all. 

Her funeral yesterday was beautiful. My heart is full as I feel for her parents. Julia insisted on coming as she wants to say goodbye to her too. 

I told her that Chesi is now an angel to which she replied, "oh Mama! Jessi is in heaven now because she has wings."

From a 3 year old, I rest my case. I need not explain. The thought is there and I wouldn't want to change a thing. She calls her Jessi by the way...

Good bye Chesi!

Please watch over your Dada, Mama and Ate Meya. Pray for them and pray for us too.

We love you!